9/20/10

Vent

Warning…watch out. This won’t be pretty.  I have noticed that over the months “friends” just seem to be disappearing.  No return emails, no return messages, deleting me off facebook.  And you know why?  I’ll tell you why.  Because my family dynamics aren’t  the same as everyone else’s.  Because I have an autistic child.  Because I can’t show up for social hour or talk about how great my kid did in the school pageant.  I don’t guess I understand anymore how the fact that you know people for 30 years just doesn’t  matter anymore.  We BOTHER people because they have to think that this world isn’t pretty and that some kids have real issues.  They don’t want to ask me how I am because you know what, I’m doing crappy and they don’t care, because they are on their way to ballet or baseball practice. 

Bottom line…I guess we are just WEIRD.  Sorry world, we’re weird.  Our son is autistic.  He has issues.  He would rather be by himself than with anyone else.  Too much stimulation and you know what? You may get shoved or get something thrown at you because he doesn’t know how to express his frustration.  

If you feel sorry for us, then I may just throw something at YOU, because that’s not what this is about.  This is about understanding that people are different and accepting them as they are.  This is about standing by people because you are their friend.  I have so many friends who struggle with many different issues and you know what?  I have GROWN because they are a part of my life.  God made us all different…and we are to be loving and kind and accepting of others.  Not judgmental and condemning and delete people out of your life because they don’t fit your idea of a so-called perfect life.

MY frustration right now?  Friends who have no so called issues who just flat out decide that our issues are too much and infringe on their perfect, drama-free, normal kid filled life. 

I’m over the top at the moment with my anger and this is the ONLY way I can let this out without someone getting hurt or me just deciding to jump out my window or my moving car.  I have reached my limit. 

I’m eternally grateful to my support system that I do have.  The friends and family who have stuck by us and been there for us from the beginning.  And if you are reading this blog, this is not directed at you.  Trust me.  The people that this is about  don’t read my blog because they don’t give a crap.  Special needs kids need people to give a crap.  Their families need people who give a crap.  And you know what…to you guys out there who have decided that we just ask for prayers too much, or WHATEVER YOUR issue is.  I DON’T GIVE A CRAP.  GOODBYE. 

8 comments:

Baloney said...

I remember when I hit that point. Parenting a child with autism changes a lot of relationships.
If it makes you feel better, very few of my friends read my blog and almost none of my family.
But I have been blessed by the people (like you) who have entered my life because of autism.
You will make peace with this one day, but for now a little anger is justified!

Julie Jabbers said...

Its good to vent. Yesterday I had a million feelings, but couldn't really put the serious issues on my blog, because my son and husband, want me to keep the ugly stuff private. Whatever! People that don't understand just can't, and so many don't care. I hear ya, I care and will pray for you.
Logan has me stretched thin, so I so feel for you, knowing what its all like. I pray for Eli. And, hope each day you can smile, even when you're dying inside.

Virginia said...

Hey Stacey, Sorry you are going through this. I know how it feels to lose friends for "weird" reasons. I hope you know I am thinking of you guys and glad you get to be close to Eli now. I guess if they abandoned you in your time of need they weren't true friends afterall. ((((HUGS))))

Erica said...

I feel ya with the abnormal life. my mother is mentally ill so my family is so not average at all.. but I am stronger and have healthier friendships with people who are real and can handle real life..

Stacey said...

Thanks ladies...all of you; so much. I appreciate your comments and support. Erica, I agree; in the end you do come out stronger. You have to right? What doesn't kill you makes you stronger...boy do I believe that statement now!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Real Housewives of Oklahoma said...

You need a little pick-me-up. How about an award?!
Head on over to the RHOK (www.therhok.com) and check it out!

Happy Friday!
Mrs. Priss (a.k.a. Baloney)

Michelle said...

I had this conversation with a dear friend of mine last week (both our sons are autistic), with her having the exact same issues with people disappearing. I don't get it, but ... I also have an autistic child who I refuse to hide and who I adore. Why would I abandon someone else who has challenges? Her children (and mine) are both FAR better behaved in many instances than so many of my friends with neurotypical kids anyway!