5/16/12

An Emotional Glimpse Into My Heart…

Things have been so hectic, and I feel like I am on this emotional roller coaster, but we have been so blessed, and in the painful trying times, God has given me the perfect “help meet” and friends who have been there to support us in every conceivable way.  To the members of the church of Christ in Hinton…your love and kindness and support mean the world and you are near and dear to my heart. 

The biggest and most important news in our family, and the matter closest to my heart at the moment, is the passing away of my Grandma Wilda Elizabeth Rinehart.  I had 3 grandparents that I knew before their passing.  My mom’s mom and dad, Bill and Verlie Brinson lived in Dallas, and passed several years ago.  Their love story was amazing…my grandma Verlie (who led an interesting childhood, as her neighbor was Audie Murphy) met  my grandpa the night before he shipped out for war, but she waited on him after knowing him only one night, and they were married upon his return. 

My Grandpa Rinehart and I unfortunately never had the opportunity to meet as he passed away before I was born.  My grandma Wilda had several suitors from what I understand throughout the years, but her love for my grandpa was strong until the end, and that is an inspiring kind of love for us all. 

My Grandma Wilda had been unwell for quite some time, and many years ago, my parents made the decision that it was in her best interest to sell her house and move her into an assisted living facility.  The sale of her house helped tremendously in paying for her bills, and since she was unable to care for herself alone anymore, it was time to make that change.  She was as happy as she could be there, given the situation.  She knew she had to leave her home, yet she was so strong that she carried on.  She loved her family and treasured them; they truly were the joy of her life.  She had 2 children…my dad Jay, and his sister Bobbye.  4 grandchildren – me (the only granddaughter, and she adored my husband Norman), Jordan (my brother, and she also adored his wife Callie), Neal and Rusty (brothers from my grandma’s daughter Bobbye).  But there was one person in her life whom she loved as if she were her own grandson, her nephew Toby.  She always talked about him, and every time he would call it made her day. She was so proud of him and his accomplishments, and it is just so important to me that he know and understand what he meant to her.  Toby – she loved you and was so proud of you.  She would want you to remember that every day.

SJandT 

Wow, I suppose this is turning into an obit.  Truly sorry!  She was the grandma I was blessed to see nearly every single day.  When you live on a farm as I did and you don’t have girls your age next door, my best friend was a horse (his name was Harlan), and my grandma.  She was the Godliest woman I know, and she  encourages  me to live up to her example so that my children can look back when I am gone and know that I did the best job I could. 

Grandma Grandma1

GreatGrandmaR2 GreatGrandmaR1

The one thing that I have learned with my best friend Michelle’s death, as well as the deaths of Kami, Stefan, Paul, and on and on, is that you never know when your number is up.  Life isn’t fair, but it isn’t supposed to be.  Life is a test…do we believe in God and put him first and foremost in our lives even (and especially) when it’s not convenient?  Or do we just “do the right Christian thing” when it fits into our schedule?  God will provide for us if we follow him.  He never promised us that this life would be easy…but if we sacrifice now whether it be time, money, etc, we are promised a reward that will make this sooo much more than worthwhile.  God brought the Israelites out of the desert that they had wandered around in for 40 years.  Just because our problems aren’t  fixed immediately, we cannot give up on God.  I struggled so much with this when Eli was diagnosed with Autism/Aspergers, Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), ADHD, Sensory Integration Disorder, and on and on.  But I know we have Eli to cherish for a particular reason, and only God knows that reason and the purpose for it.  Honestly, there are days where I still am angry, and I struggle.  Satan rejoices when I question God, and I am working so hard to get past that.  But as any special needs mom will tell you, I think it’s pretty normal.  But nothing God creates is imperfect.  NOTHING.  So Eli is perfect in his own special way, and in the hardest of times where I want to curl up in bed and cry all day, I need to focus hard and glorify God and turn my thoughts to him instead of my own selfish feelings. 

I just want to leave you with this verse…This was taken from the NIV, and I am just copying and pasting.  Just think that if we lived more by this code instead of focusing on self, how much more peaceful of a world we would be living in.  This is a daily struggle for me, as I can be totally caught up in the trends (shoes and dresses are my weaknesses!)  But we are human, and all we can do is try.  So I will leave you with this, and hopefully this will touch your heart as it has touched mine. 

Matthew 25:35-41

New International Version (NIV)

35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in,(A) 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me,(B) I was sick and you looked after me,(C) I was in prison and you came to visit me.’(D)

37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’(E)

Love to all of my dearest friends and family.  You will never know how much you mean to me.  And to my parents…I couldn’t have asked or dreamed of better people to turn to, rely on, love, and look up to.  You truly pick me up when I am in a dark place, and knowing that your advice is based with scripture in mind , I couldn’t have been any luckier.  God placed me in the right hands.  :)  I love you both dearly. 

XOXO

No comments: