This Christmas has got to take the cake when it comes to the oddness of it all. Dad not being here was so strange...and my mom's way of trying to move forward included not hanging his stocking up. For 41 years I've seen all of our hand-made stockings hanging side by side, and new ones were lovingly made every time a new grandbaby joined our family. It was more unsettling and so jarring to me to not see his stocking there next to my moms. I noticed she has taken off her wedding band and instead wears the band that my dad got for her in Israel. These are such small changes, but it is so incredibly painful to watch this transition, and it scares me because someday I know that it will either be me left alone without Norman, or it will be Norman left without me. That is a pain so deep that I cannot bear to even think about it. I simply cannot imagine your partner of 50 years just suddenly gone...and yet the world moves on and nobody cares that you are grieving. And the bloody statement that people toss out about time healing your heart. That is utter nonsense.
Life does go on though...and as proof, I now have a sweet new nephew...Jordan and Callie's baby, Crew Oliver. Born one day before Eli's birthday; he is so sweet, and he was the highlight of our Christmas.
I don't know what 2022 holds, but I pray it is better than 2020 and 2021. I'd say it can't get any worse, but just as sure as I say that, I will be proven wrong. So here's to some hope...the little I'm still holding onto. I'm praying this 2nd round of covid that hit our house goes away quickly and we can resume life as normal. I pray everyone reading this will have a happy and healthy 2022. Love your family...hold them close and tell them how much they mean to you. You never know when your last moments with someone will be.
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